Be Corny and Chow Down!

As the days get colder, warm, comforting foods tend to dwell on our minds. One such food is soup, and one particularly comforting kind of soup is chowder.

Since my chronicler Hushicho had a bad experience with some canned corn chowder that had turned, upwards of twenty years previous, this was a special challenge: develop a recipe homemade that could be duplicated without that same risk! So naturally, as I often do, I rose to the occasion.

The Corniest Chowder Ever

Ingredients

2 C milk or soymilk (or any sort of milk; nutmilks will also work nicely)
1 tbsp butter or margarine
1 baking potato, cubed
1 can kernel corn
1/4-1/2 large onion
carrot, sliced thin, to taste
1 bay leaf

all to taste:

garlic
basil
parsley
sea salt
black pepper

1) In a saucepan, heat the butter or margarine over medium-high heat until it has melted. Add the onion, carrot, and all spices except for salt and pepper, and stir to coat. Cook for 5 or so minutes, until the onions have reduced and are mostly transparent.

2) Add the milk and stir thoroughly. Bring just to a boil, then add the potato. Turn the heat down and let it simmer for at least 10 minutes.

3) Add the salt, pepper, and corn. Stir thoroughly and let cook for at least 5 more minutes, making sure the potato is tender and not hard.

4) Serve hot. This recipe will serve two with a side dish!


Tips and Such

- Cut the potato into small pieces so that it will be sure to cook within the 10 or so minutes. It's also nicer to fit onto the spoon if it's not a huge unwieldy chunk of tater!

- You can add a little hot pepper at the start, if you like a bit of extra heat! Or use Hungarian paprika, which is hotter than the paprika most groceries have. Experiment and play around! You might find something you especially enjoy.

- You can add a spoon of flour at the beginning, coating the onion and carrot, if you like your soup thicker. If you decide later that you would like it thicker, take some of the broth and ladle it into a bowl, then take a spoonful of cornstarch and whisk it together until it is completely blended. Add this back to your soup and stir it completely in. Your chowder should thicken quickly!

- You can add less corn, if you prefer less. Corn makes the dish sweeter and richer, and you will probably find every spoonful of chowder with some vegetable in it.

As you can see, it turned out wonderfully! This dish will make your day on these cold afternoons. When you don't have an Incubus to cuddle, choose the next best thing!

};) Dhiar <3

Incutales Cupcakes!

So Uhr has been wanting to learn how to cook lately, and I thought it would make things extra-fun if we made an Uhr-themed cupcake, one that reminds of how darling and adorable he is. "But Miester," he insisted, "we must make one of you if there is one of me!"

As a result, we have Dhiar and Uhr themed cupcakes!

Dhiar and Uhr Cupcakes

Ingredients

1 1/2 C flour
3/4 C sugar
1/2-1 tsp baking powder
1 stick margarine or butter
2 eggs
milk
confectioners sugar
cocoa powder
vanilla extract
strawberry flavouring
red food colour
red and white sugar sprinkles
baking cups

Cupcakes

1) Preheat the oven to 350 F/175 C. Line a 12-cup muffin pan with baking cups.

2) Blend together flour, sugar, baking powder, and then 1/2 stick butter, vanilla extract to taste, and the eggs in a bowl. Mix thoroughly, slowly adding milk by spoonful until batter reaches desired consistency. It should be standard cake consistency, runny but not watery.

3) Pour half of the batter into a separate bowl. In the original bowl, add strawberry flavouring, to taste. Usually around 1-2 tbsp will add a delightful strawberry flavour. Add red food colour to the other bowl's batter and mix thoroughly.

4) Spoon out batter into baking cups. Try to get the same amount in each, but don't worry too much if some have more than others.

5) Bake for 15-20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the centre comes out clean. Do not overbake.

6) Set on rack to cool.

Frosting

1) Place 1/4 stick of butter with 3 tbsp confectioners sugar in one bowl. Place 1/4 stick of butter with 2 tbsp cocoa powder and 1 tbsp confectioners sugar in the other bowl.

2) Add 1/2 tsp milk and mix thoroughly. An electric mixer is ideal for this. Mix for a couple of minutes, until the frosting is light and fluffy and does not run. If the frosting is too runny, add more sugar; if it is too thick, add more milk, 1/2 tsp at a time, and blend thoroughly after adding every ingredient.

3) Frost the cupcakes when cooled, using the chocolate frosting for the red cupcakes, and the white frosting for the other cupcakes. Add the sugar sprinkles on top of the white frosting for a festive Uhr-like appearance!

Dhiar and Uhr cupcakes together!

 The Dhiarcakes in their sultry chocolate glory!

 Uhrcakes are pure and adorable!

 Even in cupcake motif, Dhiar takes it off sexily!

Since these are Dhiar and Uhr motifs, they must go together!

Aren't they delightful and fun? You can have an especially exciting Incutales party by making a nice pot of tea and serving these cupcakes. The recipe makes twelve, six of each kind, which is enough for six people each to enjoy one of the Dhiar and one of the Uhr motif. That's quite a nice tea party! Or if you're so inclined, they also go wonderfully with a nice cream liqueur.

So next time you're up for some quick and easy cupcakes, think about making them Incutales style! It doesn't take long, and it's loads of fun to make cupcakes on your own exciting motifs.

Enjoy!

};) Dhiar <3

Quick and Easy Sea Salt Bread

Sometimes you just need a good loaf of bread. But somehow, many are frightened by the prospect of baking bread. They fear complexity and difficulty in their cooking; they would rather make something that can be thrown together in just a few minutes.

Don't worry! This is easy bread. A minimum of ingredients, and good ingredients, make for a delicious breakfast food, a lovely snack, or even a fantastic way to make a memorable sandwich. Try it out! I promise, it's easy.

Sea Salt Bread

Ingredients

2 1/2 C flour
1 1/2 C warm water
1/2 C cool water
1 tsp active yeast
dash sugar
sea salt

1) Whisk together the flour, yeast, sugar, and a dash of sea salt, until it is all blended and the flour is smooth.

2) Add the warm water, a little at a time, and blend thoroughly with a wooden spoon. Once it becomes thick enough, dust your hands with flour and knead the dough until smooth.

3) Cover the bowl with a tea towel and let it sit. Preheat the oven to 375 F/190 C.

4) When the oven is ready, uncover the dough and knead it again. Add the cool water and continue to knead until it becomes sticky.

5) Put the dough in a greased loaf pan and shape to the desired appearance. Sprinkle sea salt crystals over the top.

6) Bake for around 45 minutes to an hour, or until pleasantly golden.

7) Set on a rack to cool.


Tips and Such

- You can test to make sure bread is done by inserting a toothpick in the middle. If it comes out clean, the bread has baked throughout. This is helpful so that you don't accidentally take a loaf of bread out before it has thoroughly baked, leaving it underbaked in the centre!

- It is essential that you either have a rack or constantly move your bread so that it can cool. If you don't have a rack, you'll have bread with a soggy bottom. It'll ruin the lovely crisp crust! If you don't have a rack, you can prop the bread at an angle so the steam can escape.

- If you want to, you can omit the salt topping. It adds a zing to the taste, but it's not necessary if you prefer to use less salt.

- Use a bread box or cover the bread so that it doesn't dry out. Freshly-baked bread tends to dry out within a few days, and it becomes largely inedible by itself. You can still use old bread, though, as croutons, to make bread pudding, or to make a traditional dish developed by the French. Called pain perdu, which means 'lost bread', it was developed to make a use for bread that had hardened and become unusable for anything else. Dipped in egg and cooked, it is known to most of the rest of the world as French toast!

I hope you will enjoy my simple sea salt bread. Homemade bread doesn't have to be difficult, and it can bring such a warmth to the hearts of all who eat it. Enjoy some today! It doesn't take a lot of effort or time. And your kitchen will smell wonderful.

};) Dhiar <3

Fakin' Bacon

Many people enjoy the smoky flavours of things like bacon, but when you don't eat meat, your options are limited. These days you can get pre-made items, which are generally tasty. But what if you don't have any in the house? Or what if you like the taste, but want it on something else?

I have just the thing for you!

Jazz up those veggie dogs, spruce up that falafel! Here's a sauce you can make that you can use for preparing anything with a delightfully smoky flavour.

Smoke Gets in Your Sauce

Ingredients

3 tbsp nutritional yeast flakes
3 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp liquid smoke
1 tsp sugar

1) Mix all ingredients thoroughly. Use as a marinade near the end of cooking, or a dipping sauce.


Tips and Such

- If you want to make facon, as it's commonly called, press a block of tofu and then slice it into thin slices. Cook it in an oil of your choice until it is golden and has become a little crispy. Add the sauce to it and cook it until it is crispy. Serve hot.

- This sauce is best added at the end, when the food is almost finished cooking, but has enough time left to soak in the flavours. You don't want to put it on too early, because the nature of the sauce means that it will cook on quickly and may burn if cooked too long.

- A couple of spoonfuls should be enough for a couple of veggie dogs, so if you have any left, just refrigerate it.

- Be sure to pay attention when buying liquid smoke. Most liquid smoke is made in a vegan style, but not all. Check out the ingredients when you pick up your bottle!


This recipe is quick and easy, and it's sure to please anyone with a craving for that smoky flavour. Try it on some of your favourite foods!

};) Dhiar <3

Tofu of the Mongols

Admittedly, this isn't an actual Mongolian recipe, but instead it's based around the dishes calling themselves 'Mongolian', primarily in places outside of Mongolia.

Would Genghis Khan approve?

Well, who knows.

But I approve!

Rich Mongolian Tofu

Ingredients

1 block tofu
1 bell pepper (red is sweeter, if you like sweet)
2 eggs
sliced lotus root
sliced onion
soy sauce
hoisin sauce
mirin (optional)
sesame oil
cornstarch
pepper (cayenne, shichimi togarashi, white, or black, or some combination)
water

1) Press the tofu as always, and cut it into cubes. Heat a little sesame oil in a frypan over medium-high heat and, when it is hot enough, add the tofu and stir to coat. Cook until lightly browned, stirring regularly so it does not burn.

2) In a bowl, mix equal parts soy sauce and hoisin sauce with 1 tbsp mirin and 1 tsp sesame oil for every 2 tbsp soy sauce and hoisin sauce. Add 1 tsp cornstarch and blend thoroughly, adding water to mix. It might be a little thin, but it will thicken with cooking.

3) Break two eggs into a bowl and add your pepper of choice. Blend thoroughly.

4) Add the egg to the tofu, stirring constantly to coat, until the egg has cooked around the tofu.

5) Add onion, bell pepper, and lotus root, allowing it to cook until the onion is semi-transparent and fragrant. This should take about a minute.

6) Pour the soy-hoisin mixture over the contents of the frypan and stir to coat. Cook for a few more minutes, so that the tofu can absorb the flavour of the sauce and the sauce can thicken.

7) Serve hot!

Tips and Such

- Many Asian markets will have lotus root already sliced and frozen. This makes it convenient to take what you need and keep the rest frozen, so you don't have to worry about slicing fresh lotus root every time. It also keeps much longer than fresh, which is a consideration if you don't use lotus root frequently. It is arguably the best part of the recipe, so please don't omit it!

- If you want to omit the eggs, that's fine. They add a certain dimension and texture to the dish, but they are entirely optional if you don't like eggs or don't have any on hand. You might substitute textured vegetable protein or various wheatmeats, or any other food you prefer!

This recipe is easy and makes a delicious meal that anyone can enjoy. It may not be Mongolian really, but it's so tasty even Genghis Khan surely wouldn't care.

};) Dhiar <3

Simple and Delicious Udon

Even in the heat of summer, udon is a welcome and often refreshing treat. The Japanese belief is that if it is hot, eat something that is also hot...it will stimulate sweating and cool you off! So udon is eaten throughout the year.

This is a simple recipe that can be customised to your liking. Give it a try! You'll find its taste and quality is comparable to a noodle shop's.

Simple Udon

Ingredients

futomaru udon (any udon will do, this is just a favourite)
satoimo noodles (I use Malony or マロニー)
kelp (also called konbu)
sesame oil
water
3 tbsp soy sauce
1-2 tbsp mirin
3 cloves of garlic, or to taste
ginger, to taste
thin-sliced lotus root (optional)

1) Use kitchen scissors to cut a piece of kelp that is about 2"x2" at least, or larger to your preference. Cut it into medium-sized strips and place it in a bowl.

2) Heat as much water as you want broth for your udon. Once it boils, take it off heat and pour it over the kelp. Cover the bowl and let it sit for at least five minutes.

3) Heat a small amount of sesame oil (about 1 tsp) in a saucepan. Peel the garlic cloves and slice them into smaller pieces, and add the garlic and ginger to the sesame oil. Saute until it is aromatic, probably about 30 seconds or so.

4) Add the kelp and broth to the saucepan, then add soy sauce and mirin. If you are using lotus root, add it now. Turn to medium heat, to cook.

5) Prepare the futomaru udon by boiling a pot of water and adding the noodles to the boiling water. Keep it cooking steadily for around 10 minutes.

6) About 3-5 minutes before the futomaru udon is ready, add the satoimo noodles to the cooking broth. This will make them ready by the time your udon is.

7) Remove the futomaru udon from water and place them in your bowl. Then pour the contents of the broth over it. You can serve with shichimi togarashi or any topping.

Tips and Such

- If you don't have mirin, simply add some sake and a pinch of sugar to the broth. The sweetness of mirin doesn't really feature in the finished dish, but it does add a contrast that brings out the robust tones of the soy sauce better than if it were just alone.

This is a simple and delicious dish! Everybody loves a good udon. It only takes a few minutes to make, and it is so comforting and yummy. You will feel better after tasting this traditional style udon!


};) Dhiar <3

The Best Sauerkraut Veggie Dogs Ever

Jager has been making himself comfortable, and it's been an exciting challenge to provide him with delicious vegetarian foods in the style of his homeland. So today I tried a very successful experiment: wieners with sauerkraut.

As some of you may know, not all vegetarian wieners are created equal. Unfortunately there are some that aren't as tasty as others. But this recipe accounts for that, in case you can only put hands on veggie dogs that are okay but not great.

For especially delicious vegetarian wieners, I recommend Veggie Patch or Tofurky. But this recipe is good no matter what kind of hot dogs you use. You may want to keep your Veggie Patch or Tofurky wieners to eat with minimal condiments, and use your less favourite ones for this recipe.

Best Sauerkraut Veggie Dogs Ever

Ingredients

2 vegetarian hot dogs
2 buns
1 can sauerkraut (I like Bavarian-style)
1 tbsp Bavarian mustard (see Tips and Such if you don't have this)
1 tbsp instant mushroom stock
water
dash salt
black pepper, to taste
Hungarian paprika, to taste (optional)

1) Drain the sauerkraut. Rinse it if you find canned sauerkraut too acidic and strong. If you aren't going to prepare the entire can's contents, put the rest in a container and refrigerate.

2) Dilute 1 tbsp Bavarian mustard in enough water to cover the bottom of a small frypan. Place the wieners in the frypan with the diluted mustard solution and roll to cover.

3) Heat over medium to medium-high heat and continue to roll them so they cook evenly, until tender and until the liquid has all cooked off.

4) Place the sauerkraut in a small saucepan and add the mushroom stock powder, salt, black pepper, and paprika. Add a little water and mix thoroughly. If you prefer, instead of water, you can add a splash of beer instead. Or you can even just substitute beer for the mushroom stock entirely.

5) Cook sauerkraut over medium heat until most of the liquid has cooked off.

6) Serve on sturdy buns!

Tips and Such

- Use Bavarian mustard for the best taste. Bavarian mustard is sweet, which balances the sour and salty tastes of the sauerkraut in this recipe. It also gives a gentle tangy quality to the hot dogs, which is something very valuable if they are less than delicious on their own. If you don't have access to Bavarian mustard, use whatever mustard you can find and add a pinch of sugar (like Florida Crystals) and a dash or two of tarragon.

- Make sure the liquid is cooked out of both items so that when you add it, it doesn't make the bun soggy. Soggy buns mean messy hands, because buns just fall apart when they get soggy. I think that is the most absolutely perverted I have ever sounded in my life while trying to give genuine advice.

Quick, a distraction!

This is a quick, easy preparation which can add taste to even the most lacking of veggie dogs! Give it a try, and I feel certain that you won't be disappointed.

Happy Wieners to You!

};) Dhiar <3